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Thursday, July 24, 2008

Lawyers Always Tell The Truth

This robber from across the border robbed a bank in Texas. He managed to evade arrest for a while but eventually the sheriff spotted him in a bar and caught him.

He brought in the robber for questioning and demanded that he tell the truth, "Where did you hide the loot?" Unfortunately, the robber couldn't answer as he could only speak in Spanish, so the sheriff asked the only lawyer in town, who happened to speak Spanish, to translate his question.

The frightened robber blurted out in Spanish that he buried the money under a tree in the churchyard. The sheriff turned to the lawyer and asked, "What did he say?"

The lawyer answered, "He said that you are a crooked bum law-keeper who cannot shoot a bull three feet away."

Elaborate Plan

Two blondes decided to rob a bank and sat down to draw up an elaborate plan for the heist. They practised the routine many times in their heads. Then the big day came.

One blonde sat waiting in the car while the other went into the bank. Five minutes, ten minutes and then half an hour passed. She was not supposed to take that long inside the bank.

After what seemed like ages she finally came running out with the safe tied securely with a rope. Moments later, the door of the bank swung open and out came the security guard, clumsily blasting away with his pump gun because his trousers were down to the floor!

As they fled away in their car, one blonde said to the other, "You idiot! You're supposed to tie up the security guard and blow the safe."

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